Weekly Devotional: Church Anxiety

Church anxiety is a feeling of dread or nervousness when attending or thinking about attending church. Feeling anxious is more common than you might think — an estimated 7.1% (15 million) Americans have social anxiety disorder¹ and 19.1% (50 million) have some kind of anxiety disorder.² Since church is inherently social, we may feel anxious about potential social interactions, judgments, expectations or negative experiences.

The worst thing about church anxiety is that it can keep you from one of the best parts of Christianity. Church fosters a community of support, spiritual growth and discipleship in Christ. It can educate us on biblical principles and hold us accountable for our behavior. Most importantly, it can help you flourish in your relationship with God.

Whether you are a newly converted Christian, a Christian coming home after years away or are just curious about the faith, this article may help you to overcome this hurdle in your spiritual journey. 

In This Article:

• Common Causes for Church Anxiety
• Strategies to Overcome Anxiety
• Find Support and Community at GCU 

Common Causes for Church Anxiety

New Place, New People

We tend to be uncomfortable in unfamiliar settings and around unfamiliar people. There’s no guarantee as to what you can expect, especially as Christianity has such a large scope. Unlike notorious fast-food chains or big retail companies, you won’t be able to find two churches that are exactly alike. 

Sure, each church is committed to Christ. But you may find that one puts more emphasis on a certain biblical principle than others. One church might focus more on service and volunteer work than on worship and prayer. Another might have more older folks than young people. And some might have a choir singing traditional hymns, while others have a worship team leading with more modern praise songs.

People are different, too. As a newcomer, there are social norms like church attire and participation rituals you’ll have to learn over time. This can lead to fears of making a mistake and being judged before the service even begins.

The “Right” Church

New converts may feel a bit lost as to what to pick for their future home-away-from-home, especially if they have no other Christians in their circle to ask for advice. When you pick a church, you also are picking your peers and your community that you’ll see at least once a week. This kind of choice is one you don’t make often in your life.

For example, college students who regularly attended church with their families often find themselves responsible for choosing a new church to attend. Easier said than done! With so many components to consider, how can anyone be sure which church is the ‘right’ one for them?

Embarrassment and Shame

Finally, embarrassment and shame are some of the worst causes of church anxiety. 

Nobody likes to admit they are ignorant or don’t know something. We may feel discomfort or insecurity when we don’t know something everyone else does. New converts, especially, may feel like outsiders at the beginning of their spiritual journey and they may never ‘catch up’ on the years that other Christians have had in church.

Additionally, some may feel embarrassed to return to church after distancing themselves from Christ. They may feel unworthy or ashamed that they fell out with the faith at all, and by returning to church, they will be judged for their absence. 

These are just a few of the possible causes of church anxiety. Whatever reasons you may attribute to your nervousness, remember that you are not alone. Most churches will have members who also had to overcome their anxiety to meet new people and try new things, and these members tend to be the most welcoming of newcomers. Give your worries to Christ and trust that he will provide a path for you to find your community.

Strategies to Overcome Anxiety 

Research, Research, Research

Knowledge is one of the best medicines for anxiety — so much of what we fear is what we don’t know. By researching churches, you can learn which ones you’re more likely to identify with and reassure yourself. 

Ask yourself questions such as: what principles and values are the most important to me? Most churches have mission statements on their websites that voice their priorities. Time and location are also important. If you don’t feel confident that you can wake up early for a 9 am service, make sure there is a 11 am; a closer church may be more convenient, but another may be worth the long drive. Another component to consider is groups, ministries and church events. These can tell you a lot about who attends services and more about the values of the church. Is there a young adult study group? A children’s ministry? A BBQ-cookout?

But keep in mind that there is only so much research you can do before you just have to pick. Sometimes, we run into the problem of having too many options and feel pressure to get a church we like right from the get-go. In this case, prepare a few backups in case your first pick doesn't turn out how you planned.

Baby Steps

If getting in a car and driving to church still seems overwhelming, that’s okay! Taking steps to prepare yourself for church can be just as meaningful as attending in person, as long as you get there eventually.

You can get the full benefits of church by going in person, but online services may offer a smoother transition from not attending church at all to regular attendance. Churches that offer online services can teach newcomers what a service looks like and allow them to see how compatible they are with the church. Once you know what you’ll be walking into, you may feel more confident showing up in person.

Another baby step you can take is starting with a community of two: you and your friend. Start with another Christian who can share in your spiritual journey and hold you accountable. One-on-one bible study, journaling together, long conversations about faith and praying together are all ways you can build up your community and your confidence.

Find a Friend

Christians who belong to a church can help show you the ropes and acquaint you with fellow members, groups and ministries. More often than not, they will tend to be excited to share their faith and have you in their community. You don’t have to be best friends with this person, as long as you trust them.

They don’t necessarily have to be Christian either — if they are skeptical of religion or Christianity, tell them to think of it more as a friend coming with you to the doctor’s office. Sure, a doctor’s visit may not benefit your friend directly but by accompanying you, they're supporting you in doing what's best for your well-being — something they hopefully care about as your friend. Worst case, they sit through an hour or so of worship and conversation — not exactly the worst thing in the world. And after the first visit, you may feel confident enough to go back on your own next week.

But if you ask and they seem uncomfortable or against going, don’t burden them by making them come with you. At the end of the day, it is on you to take yourself to church and stand on your faith, not anybody else.

Find Support and Community at GCU

Perhaps you would like support in your spiritual journey in young adulthood. GCU offers various faith-rooted communities and events, such as ministries, Life Groups and weekly Chapel services. If you feel called to a relationship with Christ, consider applying to GCU to integrate your education with faith.